there will be a moment when
I sit down and talk about the events
leading up to their birth
and their birth.
but today I’m acknowledging that they’re here.
they came quickly Sunday morning.
27 weeks. 5 days.
And as each day passes my heart
stretches to try to be with them
apart of them.
i grew these two babies
their flesh came from mine
and it feels empty wtihtout them
inside my tummy.
a aching scar reminding me
of where they were pulled from my body.
raja didn’t want to leave.
he curled inside and deeper into my body.
thao was a bit more eager.
now they’re both here in
their rainforest life environment
across the room from each other.
this is hard.
leaving babies is hard.
not touching babies all the time is hard.
and I’m greedy for them.
I’m needing to be around them.
they’re outside my body too early
like little marsupials
and my breasts weep for them
threw so many tubes.
they’re strong. and safe. and beautiful.
and this road is going to be rough.